Wednesday, August 31

battlefield...

School has started and for the most part has kicked into full gear. its not too bad this year. theres one thing...one thing that truly kills my heart. to see so many lost people the same building. to see how artificial smiles people are wearing. i see the pain in the eyes of the unexpected. and i can feel the pain of the lives that everyone knows about. my life, suddenly rushes to the end of the list of importance and i find myself praying for nameless faces, people i dont even know. i like it though. to find myself praying, as if it is a habbit, something i dont realize im doing...but even through praying for them...i still hurt for them. why cant i feel my own pain anymore? i find it easier to deal with everybody elses pain than my own. is that a good or bad thing? i'll let you decide. my school, alike many other schools, is a spiritual battlefield. at times its like i can almost hear satan laughing at "his fools"...i can just imagine the delight on his face every time someone curses, or gets drunk...has sex, pops pills, slits their wrist, fights, smokes...this is exactly where satan wants our schools today. and as i feel like i can see the delight of satan, i can feel the pain of Jesus...i wipe his tears from my face daily...as i know what eterenity holds for these people...and it scares me...i know..so why dont i help? we need a revolution!! im not kidding. a revolution of people that will stand up and scream from the top of their lungs that Jesus is life, that everything of the world is just that..of the world..and when we all leave here..it will still be that..of the world...i dont know...its easy for me to say this...why cant i just start a revolution?...for some reason that is how we think...im not going to do it..surely somebody else will...yea...lets just sit and wait and see what happens..or not...im tired of sitting on the sidelines of the battlefield...im going in full force~